Anonymous Postcard: Claim Detail

Claim No.: 019520081203

The Gym Teachers of America

We spent a couple of hours together every week for my entire childhood, and I think that during that time I was hit with an average of two dodgeballs a day. Plus there was that one time when I kicked the soccer ball at the same time as Jessica Mintier and fell backwards and blacked out. Did I mention that I was the kid who the team captains negotiated about NOT having to take for any given team? Always?

Anyhow, I grew up thinking that I was bad at sports, and that I hated all of them.

Now I realize: it's only sports that involve balls thrown at or kicked towards me.

Please diversify your elementary school curricula: some of us spent years covered with welts for no good reason.

Mailed: 2009-01-07

All images copyright Tucker Nichols